Sunday, July 26, 2015

And I thought I was bored

I'd had a boring week. This hardly ever happens; the last time was a couple of years ago, I think. But here's what I noticed that led me to believe I was bored:
  • I need daily conversation to keep my spirit engaged. When we live in Tucson in the winter, I have daily multiple conversations. When we come home there are not so many. My husband Art is not a big talker, so the house is quiet.
  • I love being a mediator, but I've become disenchanted with those involving a divorce or a parenting plan. Where I live, if people have a contested divorce they are required to go to mediation before they go to court. Often, mediations are like a checkbox for people. There's lots of negativity between divorcing couples, and often the children are in the middle. I like to do one mediation a week, but if I don't do the dissolution ones, I don't mediate as often, and I miss it.
  • I like mediating in small claims court, and now I'm qualified as lead, but that's mostly about paperwork which I'm not yet as competent at as I want. And it's only for a couple of hours every other week.
  • My sister Alyx is the primary gardener this year. She does almost all the work of planting and watering. Such a good thing! And yet it leaves me with a smaller role.
  • For the last year and a half I've been a watchful advocate for my husband Art's health since his cardiac arrest in January of 2014. Now he is living his own life, taking care of his own health and medications and appointments. He is quite stable and doesn't need me as an advocate now. I'm delighted about his health, of course, but it means there's less for me to do.
Even though there are good things going on too (good exercise program, lots of book reading) I was pretty sure I needed to find a few new things to energize my spirit.

And then my brand new car had a bad week.
  • I went to Cost Plus on Monday and parked in their lot. Drove home with my new scarf. My stepson Pete came in and said, "Linda, what happened to the front quarter panel of your car? It's got a big dent." I went outside and, sure enough, something had hit my parked car. I have a $500 deductible on my insurance so I called a local guy to see if he could recommend someone reasonable. The next day I talked to my barista. He said the dent was from a shopping cart banging into the car. He got a rock from his parking lot and pulled most of the dent out. I can still see it if I look, and every male I've talked to told me I should have it fixed, but I hadn't decided what to do yet. We drove 800 miles to and from a family wedding this weekend, enjoying the quiet ride.
  • We have a large pile of bark in our driveway, waiting to be shoveled into our yard to keep the weeds down. Our grandson Kyle will be doing that tomorrow. I pulled into the driveway around the bark and hit a landscape rock. Backed up to extricate the car. Art took a look and says there are three or four scrapes over a foot of length and four inches wide. It will need to be sanded and painted. This one was my fault.
  • I was so upset I set the brake and got out of the car to rant. However, I had left the car in gear and it slid down the rain-wet, bark-dusted driveway. I leaped into the driver's seat and hit the foot brake just before the right side of the car smashed into the side of the garage. 
  • That was when I started to cry.   
So, tomorrow, at least, will not be a boring day. 


joeh said...

Last year my daughter pulled into a friends driveway which ended on a hill running down to their back yard. She left the car in neutral, no emergency brake and the door open as she went to the front door to just leave a message; the tree at the bottom of the back yard sustained major damage because well...

Does that make you feel any better? Probably not huh.

Madeline Kasian said...

OH MY! What a challenging week!!!! I have had weeks like that. When we first moved to the mountains Ken backed my SUV into a large tree while trying to unpack stuff.. $1500 damage!! I got the car back and after ONE WEEK, I was sitting in my car at the local market and an older gentleman somehow pulled out of his parking space and smashed the front quarter panel (Ken had smooshed the BACK quarter panel!) UGGGHHHH I felt jinxed!!

We also broke a gas line while digging to plant a Datura bush-- the WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD had to be evacuated! GREAT intro to the neighbors! We had a close call with a chimney fire almost setting house on fire, and then 3 months ago I left water running and made a very bad situation in my kitchen.

Some years are.. well, gonna go down in history!!!!!!

Retirement: PLAN B here we come!!

Like you,I need daily conversation, stimulation, purpose. We've moved out of the mts. full time and are now getting re established in the Valley of the Sun..will use our home in the woods of Pine,Az. as a getaway and also will be "snowbirds" (Somewhat--I am sorta burned out of the mountain thing.) ) in summers.. I actually LIKE the heat.Winter DID ME IN.

Love your blog--thank you for sharing.. retirement is not for the wimpy!!!!!!!!!

Janette said...

My husband says that he wants to put the first dent in his own car. He feels it is good luck-lol. I am sorry your new car has had its knocks so early on.
I hope a good break will bring you back to mediation full time. Those divorce cases are blocks checked, but sometimes angry people just need to hear the right thing---several times! You seem to have the presence to bring people to their senses.

DJan said...

Gosh, that's a whole lotta stuff going on with your car! But that was three times, so now it's over. Right? I'm so glad you were able to stop it before it went down the driveway. Some days are like that. I wish you a very good one or two or three to make up for it. :-)

Olga said...

Yikes, Linda! I would be spending this week in bed if it were me. I am sure you will find a way to turn things around though.

Tom said...

I'd think being a mediator would be a very difficult, very frustrating, but also very rewarding job. My ex-wife and I mediated our divorce. It was a godsend for both of us and for our two kids as well.

Linda Reeder said...

Well, I guess you have enough fix ups to exceed the $500 deductible now.

Mona McGinnis said...

Be careful what you wish for! Having to deal with car damage doesn't seem boring to me. I'm reminded of the time my mom drove into the corner of their house having stepped on the gas pedal vs brake. She said she didn't tell many people until she could laugh at it like everyone else. And then there was my cousin, who said he'd had 2 accidents and they were both in his garage. Do these minor accidents happen to send us a message? I don't know for sure. There was a period in my life when what happened to my vehicle in terms of minor collisions and speeding tickets were a reflection of how my life was going, i.e. I was going through life with teeth clenched and things needed fixing. Somehow that doesn't seem to apply to you.

Sasha + Saku said...

Yikes you definitely haven't had a boring week. Hopefully that is the last of the accidents the car is involved in.

I'm been reading your blog for sometime - I'm not sure I've commented before. But I laughed at the title because I just had a post on the weekend titled Definitely not bored...perhaps there is something in the air.

Dreamer said...

Just wanted to know that I recently found your blog and I love it. I went back to January 2010 and read them up to the present. I love all of the adventures that you and Art are having. I read your entries regarding your 2003 schooner trip and I think that my spouse and I might do it. It sounds like so much fun. We have done one Road Scholar trip a couple of years ago and enjoyed it very much. I can't believe how many trips that you have taken. I need to get on the ball and your blog inspires me to do it. Love how you are giving back. Can't wait for your next post.

Sally Wessely said...

Oh my gosh! I can't believe you had to go through all of that with your car. I'm so, so sorry.

Boring is not good. You will find something soon. Of that, I am certain. I hope things are going better now. Hugs.